Just an Average Tuesday

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Just an Average Tuesday
Basic Information
  Release date June 13, 2018
  Runtime 6m 08s
  Series Sketch
Cast and Crew
  Directed by: Nick Geoghegan
  Written by: Joey Cianfrani
Nick Geoghegan
Lucan Stargiotti
  Edited by: Nick Geoghegan
  Starring: Joey Cianfrani
Joshua Flores
Nick Geoghegan
Chris Smith
Kyle Smith
Lucan Stargiotti

Just an Average Tuesday is a sketch on the PaulWesNick channel. Posted on June 13, 2018, it features Lucan Stargiotti and Kyle Smith as a father and son who stumble across a very odd "drug deal" in the woods. The video is among PWN's strangest, an absurdist comedy in the line of Chess to the Death and Deadly Choices. The video was directed by Nick Geoghegan, and written by Geoghegan, Stargiotti, and Joey Cianfrani.

Description[edit | edit source]

The video opens with text listing the time and location as "Northeastern Kansas; Jluy 19, 2006" (the dates and places throughout the video are intentionally inconsistent). We see a suited father (Lucan) and his young, excitable son (Kyle) playing catch along a wooded path. The father throws the ball a little too hard, and it flies into the woods. The son goes running to catch it. As he wanders off the path, he stumbles across what seems to be a Mexican standoff between two thugs (Joey, Josh) and a strange man on a dirt pile (Chris). The thugs are armed.

The strange man announces himself as "The Dirt Merchant". The two men are there to acquire some of his sacred dirt. He questions the worthiness of the two men, who offer him gifts in exchange for some dirt. He refuses the two thugs, who pull guns on him. Meanwhile, the young boy tries to sneak over to retrieve his ball. Suddenly, his father comes running from the bushes and notices the deal gone wrong. Confused, the thugs turn their guns towards the man and his son. The boy is frightened, and in response, the father pulls a banana from his crotch and threatens to use force. The Italian thug warns the Mexican thug to beware the banana, which he believes will be inserted into their anuses, citing this as the cause of death of his late uncle. Their dears are confirmed when the father announces that the banana is going to be inserted in their "cooters".

In the background, we see the Dirt Merchant leap from his pile and summon his own banana from the sky. As he attempts to weild it, it is torn apart by the force of his whip, and the Dirt Merchant lets out an expletive of disappointment. The son attempts to power up his ball and throw it at the thugs. Nothing happens. The father laughs, and offers to show his son the proper attack. He utters an ancient Japanese curse, and is teleported to behind the Mexican thug. He proceeds to insert his fruit in the anus of the unsuspecting thug, who dies immediately. Terrified, the Italian thug sprints away as the father turns to attack him next. With both thugs defeated, the Dirt Merchant is impressed. He summons his minion (Nick) as a final test of stength. The minion collapses while delivering his master's pole. The father and son prepare for battle, but the Dirt Merchant suffers a fatal heart attack before he can attack. Having vanquished the Dirtchent, the father explains to his son that they will take his place as the new Merchants of Dirt.

Aftermath and Epilogue

In his story, the father explains that when a Dirt Merchant is defeated, the winners will take his place. As such, the father and son become the Merchants of the Pile, Ho-Shin-Kine. He prepares his son to "play catch for all eternity" on that pile, as the rulers of the Kingdom of Swaswosa.

A voiceover by the father (provided by Nick, not Lucan) explains that on May 14, 1963, they took their rightful seats as the Merchants of Dirt. He also explains what happened next to the young thugs that they killed on their journey. He states that Josh became a physics teacher at a secondary school in Philadelphia, while Joey went on to win the bronze medal at the 1936 Berlin Olympics. He concludes by stating that he died soon after, sixteen years before the video was released.

Cast and Crew[edit | edit source]

The following character names are as listed in the description of the video.

  • Lucan Alto Stargiotti as Normal Father - A man in a suit who takes his son out to play catch, and inadvertently becomes a Merchant of Dirt at the Mound Ho-Shin-Kine.
  • Kyle Smith as Normal Son - A young boy who joins his father in the Battle of the Dirt Mound, and becomes a Merchant of Dirt.
  • Joshua Montana Flores as Young Man #1 - A Mexican thug who attempts to take dirt from the Dirt Merchant. He is killed via anal banana insertion.
  • Joey Cianfrani as Young Man #2 - An Italian thug who collects golf balls and tries to take dirt from the Dirtchant. He survives by running away from the father.
  • Chris Smith as the Dirt Merchant (Dirtchant?) - An ancient entity who had been the Merchant of Ho-Shin-Kine who defends his dirt at the Battle of the Dirt Mound
  • Nick Geoghegan as Minion - A strange being, a follower of the Dirt Merchant and a sworn protector of Hon-Shin-Kine.

Behind the Scenes[edit | edit source]

The video was filmed on June first, a day which had been scheduled for the filming of an important scene in Don of the Damned. However, two actors canceled last minute, and the group was forced to do something else. Having already recieved Josh, they decided to not waste his time and film a different video instead. After brainstorming for a little while, the group came up with the basis for "Just and Average Tuesday".

Trivia[edit | edit source]

  • "Just and Average Tuesday" is the first sketch on the channel to be filmed with a Canon Rebel, making it one of the few high-quality sketches on PWN.
  • The video was completed before any of the APUSH Music Videos were, but was withheld until after they were all uploaded to prevent their teacher from stumbling across it.
  • An extra line in the epilogue which was recorded but went unused refered to Kyle's character going on to become President James Garfield. It was cut for pacing.
  • The sketch is one of Wesley's favorites on the channel, though he is unsure why he likes it so much.

See Also[edit | edit source]

Preceded by
Four Years of PWN
PWN Videos
June 13, 2018
Succeeded by
Nick and Lucan: Six Sketches in Sixty Minutes
Cast Members
Preceded by
Deadly Choices
Joey Cianfrani
Just an Average Tuesday
Succeeded by
Most Recent Appearance
Preceded by
Two is Company
Joshua Montana Flores
Just an Average Tuesday
Succeeded by
Most Recent Appearance
Preceded by
Jeffersonian Democracy - APUSH Music Video
Nick Geoghegan
Just an Average Tuesday
Succeeded by
Nick and Lucan: Six Sketches in Sixty Minutes
Preceded by
A Hot Lead
Chris Smith
Just an Average Tuesday
Succeeded by
Most Recent Appearance
Preceded by
A Hot Lead
Kyle Smith
Just an Average Tuesday
Succeeded by
Most Recent Appearance
Preceded by
Four Years of PWN
Lucan Stargiotti
Just an Average Tuesday
Succeeded by
Nick and Lucan: Six Sketches in Sixty Minutes